We are under the control of compulsion. The compulsion is divided into the positive compulsion and the negative compulsion. Especially, the negative compulsion has people behave harmfully to the others. You might have felt strong compulsion to hurt or kill somebody when you are pressed in a jampacked bus or when you receive unfair treatment. But you don’t express your feelings thoughtlessly because you know well that you will be punished by law if you behave as you feel. The reckless expression of compulsion pains you and others. If so, should we stand it forever? Absolutely not. For example, now you grab a balloon which is being put air in and you don’t let it go, it will burst off! An then, the more amount it stands, the more powerful the burst is. How can we handle it? When I was a soldier, I had a moment that everything was going crazy and it was like I was going to be exploded for the anger. Especially, controlling the compulsions was not easy in the group which required me strict law and order. but I was able to get some effective ways to handle my compulsion. I’m going to explain some effective ways.

First of all, control your mind. In the age of limitless competition, it is not easy to control mind. But it is also not impossible to control mind. I want to explain about ‘the rule of ten-seconds.’ If you encounter the annoying problem or even the situation you want to behave violently, just take a deep breath and count ten-seconds. For the ten seconds, think reasonably that expressing your anger would be helpful for you or not. Absolutely, it will be very hard at the first time, but if you keep doing this, it will be your new habit. With the rule of ten seconds, your compulsion will be eased off.

Second, it’s not shameful to express your feelings. But remember that thoughtless behavior without respectfulness can cause another serious problem. Maybe expressing feelings in official place or private has not been tolerated in our society because Korea is a confucian country. They tend to consider that expressing feelings can injure their prestige, so they usually hide their feelings. However, as mentioned, ‘the example of balloon’, suppressing the compulsion cause the much bigger problems. It’s not desirable. In order to avoid the terrible problem, your attitude needs to be honest and polite to deliver how you are feeling. Reading books, meditation and enjoying sports are also helpful for you to organize your minds. 

Third, be affected by positiveness. humans are relative creatures. That means, people are affected by the environment. Nowadays, we learn about all news happening around us for the development of the mass media. However, unfortunately, the news are almost full of negative accident or affairs. Knowing what is going on around us is very important, but the fact causing us so stressed is absolutely true. So, we need to stay away from those negative environment for a while. It is certain that the negative mind or attitude coms out from the negative environment. We need to change the environment to be positive. Here, the positiveness is totally different with optimism because positiveness means that you make effort to change things better continuously. 

In conclusion, modest expression of our feelings is very helpful for us to keep healthy mind and attitude. We are not balloons though, we don’t know exactly when the anger explodes suddenly. In order to avoid the serious conflict, we should know not knowing how to mange compulsion is very dangerous.